Sometimes it is not what you say
The child, sensing the anger in her mother, started to cry. I keep a box of lollipops on the bench, so I offered one to the child, since it is difficult to cry with a lollipop in your mouth. Now the mother was having a hard time being mad at me, because I had done something nice for her child. How she felt about me changed.
Quite often I have disruptive children in the courtroom, and most of the time, if you give them a lollipop, they quiet down. A child really does not want to be there; they would rather be out playing with their friends. Giving a child a lollipop changes how the parents feel about the judge and the court.
I know people that always complain that others are always rude to them and they never get good service. If they would just take a step back, look themselves and how they act, they might see it a little differently. Maybe our body language or what we just said caused a bad feeling. Could that be the reason for bad service? Is it because of ourselves?
Lesson: People always remember how you made them feel.
Lessons from the Bench, a local newspaper article by Judge Quentin Tolby, Pro Tem.
Used here by kind permission.
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